Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Chronic pain guyism

"Doctor, it took you so long that while I was waiting here in the room, I had a heart attack and had to do deep breathing to make it stop.  You really need to see people faster so they don't have heart attacks."

---Frequent flying "chronic pain" guy (visit #14 this month so far)

14 comments:

  1. He's discovered a cure for heart attack!

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  2. Wow, my dad had a heart attack on Thurs! I'll let him know that next time he just needs to do some deep breathing and work though it!

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  3. Agree with Grumpy. A spinal tap with extra pain while they play spinal tap at volume 20/10

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  4. Whatever you do for your hypothetical retribution workup, just make it so UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES DOES HE HAVE TO TAKE OFF HIS SHOES. The socks required 1 hr of "airing out" the room after he left.

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  5. just fourteen? every other day isn't **so** bad...

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  6. Wow is that why they say yoga is so good for you? I thought all that breathing with it was just all relaxing but I didn't know it cures heart attack.

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  7. I thought they had just established that yoga was bad for you and could wreck your body which now leads me to be smugly superior since I have been shunning yoga for years.

    http://www.nytimes.com/2012/01/08/magazine/how-yoga-can-wreck-your-body.html?pagewanted=all

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  8. punitive nerve conduction test(s). Upper extremities only so as not to have to take the shoes off.

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  9. Punitive external pacing.

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  10. Punitive cardioversion. With out premedication.

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  11. Let nursing studEnta practice IV starts on him - with 16G needles. Stupid douchetard.

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    Replies
    1. Ugh I meant students - damn you autocorrect!!

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