The union

A nursing assistant has called in all of her weekend shifts for the last 5 months straight, starting the week after she got off orientation. Literally every single weekend shift scheduled. The secretary who makes up the assignment sheets just writes her name in the "ill" column, even days in advance of her weekend shifts. Why bother doing it any other way?

She can't be fired without a lengthy union review and multiple layers of discussion.

Interesting thing is that in our hospital, you have to work 5 shifts (40 hours) every two weeks to qualify for full insurance benefits. So, if you want the insurance but don't want to work that much, you can just call in for as many shifts as you want and still keep your benefits during the months-long "termination process" since the hospital has to honor your contract to provide insurance even if you're not honoring your end of it by, ya know, showing up the required number of shifts. 'Tis a good way for young students who only want to work a day or two per week to defraud the hospital out of full benefits if they know they're going to be terminated around the time they graduate college anyway.